As a sex coach, how to make a woman squirt, or can you make a woman squirt, are probably the questions I hear most often. The answer is yes, and the steps are below.

Before we begin though, I want to add this caveat. This technique works, and works well. It also gets easier to orgasm each time you do it – so practice. Practice, practice, practice; because practice makes perfect.

How to make a woman squirt:

1. Sit on the very edge of your bed or a chair with your legs open. Alternately squat down next to your bed with your legs open – if you wear heels and use one arm to lean on the bed it will be easier to maintain your balance.

This position is important because it pushes everything down and forward, making it easier to reach. Also, if you’re lying on your back, you often won’t know that you squirt because the fluid falls back inside you.

2. Take some sweet almond oil and slather it generously onto the hand you’re using. Try using your non-dominant hand, as the lighter stimulation can actually improve the experience.

Sweet almond oil is a fantastic lubricant to use, and it’s cheap and easy to obtain at any health store or pharmacy.

3. Taking your middle and ring finger, place them inside the vagina, following the natural upwards curve of the body.

4. Before your fingertips reach as far back as they can go, you’ll feel a ridged area that has a different texture to the rest of the vaginal cavity. Those hard little lines are the g-spot, that’s what you want to stimulate.

5. Now notice that your thumb naturally falls in the area of the clitoris. While you are busy with g-spot stimulation, use your thumb on the clitoris. Try varying speeds, from just holding firmly, to light circular movements with medium pressure.

The clit is very sensitive, and contrary to popular belief, not all women like clitoral stimulation. In fact many hate it altogether, so another option is to stimulate around the clitoris, without directly touching it.

6. The stimulation of the g-spot is not a thrusting movement – that does nothing. Keep your fingers inside, and only stimulate the g-spot directly with a flicking movement of your fingertips. The intensity and speed will vary from woman to woman.

7. In most women it’s going to a be combination of g-spot and clitoral stimulation that will bring them to orgasm, and it’s very common for a woman to want to stop you because she feels like she needs to pee.

Kind of like going to the loo is impossible when you’re hard, if she tries she’ll find out she can’t pee either J When that feeling happens, just push through – it will pass.

8. Once your lady starts orgasming – don’t stop the stimulation! You may need to stop direct clitoral stimulation for a moment or two sometimes, but for the most part this orgasm technique tends not to cause clitoral over sensitivity.

Most women don’t know that they can have multiple orgasms because stimulation stops after the first orgasm.

Keep going through the orgasm and maybe slow down slightly after she’s cum to build up intensity again.

It is worth trying to maintain the vigorous pace after her first orgasm and all the way through though, as this can unlock a series of orgasms that are tightly packed together – a multiple orgasm.

This technique does work really well, and if you can relax and give yourself permission to enjoy it, it may lead to some of the most mind-blowing sex you and your partner can share.

One caveat though, squirting produces a lot of fluid, and if you aren’t prepared for that, well then it will take you by surprise. The fluid can gush or shoot out, and can be mistaken for urinating. It also makes guys uncomfortable with oral sex if they’re not used to it.

Last thing – keep a bottle of water near. A big one. You will need to be rehydrated!

Source: http://www.iol.co.za

Nombuyiselo Nombewu was five years old when she last saw her mother, Mathapelo Shai. Her younger twin sisters also last saw their mother 10 years ago, shortly after their father’s death.

“They have been longing to meet her for a very long time now,” said Nombuyiselo’s grandmother, Susan Nombewu.

Nombuyiselo’s yearning to meet her mother would go unrealised.

On Mother’s Day, Nombuyiselo’s charred remains were discovered by a dog rummaging through a dump site in Jouberton Extension 7 in Klerksdorp.

That Friday Gogo Susan had sent the teenager to a neighbour, about 300m away, to borrow R50 to buy electricity in the extremely cold and drizzly afternoon.

She never returned. 

Gogo Susan was horrified when she saw the remains of her granddaughter.

She said the 15-year-old was her Florence Nightingale – her guardian angel. “I still needed her very much in my life,” Gogo Susan says helplessly, hunched in a tattered chair and surrounded by mourners.

They have been streaming into the custard-coloured living room, covered with pictures of the Nombewu clan, many of them children and grandchildren. The grandmother sits surrounded by framed Bible scriptures and miniature effigies.

“I’m on medication for my high blood pressure, my diabetes, heart disease and spinal infection,” Gogo Susan says.

Her granddaughter was always the one to remind her to take her medication. “I just forget sometimes,” she murmurs. “Who will be there to remind me now?” She dabs her eyes with a damp handkerchief.

On that fateful night, when hours went by without a sign of Nombuyiselo, Gogo Susan grew concerned. She asked the twin sisters to look for her. They came back without their sister.

At about 8pm, as the cold set in, the matriarch asked her older grandson, Zamuxolo, to look for her missing grandchild.

As the night wore on and the cold bit deeper, the frail woman joined the search. Nothing.

“I became extremely weak and worried. She was always at home at that time of the evening,” Gogo Susan says.

While she was on the street corner at about 9pm, still looking out for her granddaughter, the suspect, who was later arrested, walked past and made conversation with her.

“While I was standing there, two people walked past. I couldn’t recognise the other person but I saw [name withheld] because I know him well.

“As they approached, he said to me: ‘What are you doing here so late in the evening?’ I told him I was looking for Nombuyiselo. I don’t know where she is.”

The man merely uttered “Huh,” and walked on. He would appear in the dock days later.

“I came back home and I called my daughters to alert them of Nombuyiselo’s disappearance.”

The search party commenced again the following day at 5am but there was still no sign of the Matlosana Secondary School grade 8 pupil.

“We couldn’t find her and at about 5pm we went to the police station to report her missing,” she said.

Early on Sunday morning, the family received a call from local police. Details were scant. The authorities were on their way to fetch the family.

As Gogo Susan was getting ready, her neighbour from down the road told her there was talk of a burnt body that had been found 236 steps away from her home.

The grandmother, who had acted as a mother to Nombuyiselo for most of her life, knew what this meant.

As she drew closer, people tried to stop her. She could not be stopped. It was her child.

“When I got there, it was her indeed,” she said.

The straight back hairstyle, the earrings, the remains of the umbrella she had been carrying. It was Nombuyiselo.

“They burnt my granddaughter like a dog,” she cried.

“I heard it was [name withheld] and had questions. He saw me standing and looking for Nombuyiselo yet he knew where she was. Why would he do such a painful thing to me? He grew up in front of me; he grew up with my children.”

She said Nombuyiselo died sad because she had not yet met her mother. “But now it will never happen,” she said, her sobbing drowning her speech.

“They just wanted to see her face, they wanted to hear her voice for a day, then let her be.”

Nombuyiselo’s body was discovered by a resident dumping garbage. He was alerted by his dog’s “strange actions”. The man, who asked for his identity not to be revealed, spoke to the Mail & Guardian this week, at the scene of the crime, a short distance from Nombuyiselo’s home.

A middle-aged man, who also requested anonymity, recounted that he heard “something drag past my yard” at about 3am.

“I was having a smoke because I was struggling to sleep. I heard the sounds and peeped through my window and noticed four figures pulling something, which I couldn’t make out. I decided to follow them at a distance and noticed them walk into the dump site.

“At that point I turned back because I didn’t want to put my life in danger. I didn’t know what was happening until the body was found in the morning.”

Nombuyiselo’s mother made it back to her family this week – to see her daughter’s alleged murderer in court.

Shai arrived at the Nombewu home two days after she was told the grim story about her daughter.

She wept uncontrollably when Nombuyiselo’s alleged killer emerged from the Klerksdorp Magistrate Court’s holding cells and was escorted to the dock of Courtroom A by an orderly.

She urged the harshest punishment for those responsible for Nombuyiselo’s death.

Shai lives in a shack in Eikenhof settlement in Johannesburg South.

“I wanted to visit them or they visit me but I didn’t have money because I’m unemployed,” she said. She also cites family conflicts as another reason for the lack of contact. “But their older sister [Nosipho Nombewu, 21] visited them at least twice a year.”

Nozipho, who lives in central Johannesburg, found their mother about two years ago.

The ultimate betrayal

Half of all murders of women are carried out by their partners and South Africa has the highest rate of those, according to a 2015 policy brief by the Alan J Flisher Centre for Public Mental Health.

This is not new. In 2004, the South African Medical Research Council said that every six hours a woman is killed by her partner. Its 2012 follow-up study reflected a decrease, in line with the general decrease in murder rates.

But a woman still dies every eight hours at the hands of her partner, who can be a (former) husband or (former) boyfriend.

A Statistics South Africa health survey published last week revealed that 21% of women over 18 in South Africa have experienced violence at the hands of their partner.

These studies confirm that black African women from rural areas, and in lower-income families, are at the greatest risk of intimate partner violence. The most dangerous moment for a woman trapped in a violent relationship is when she leaves the partner. – Ruth Hopkins

Source: http://www.mg.co.za